First of all, I want to thank everyone who offered advice and support in connection with my job hunt. I am really touched that so many strangers took an interest in my problems.
The good news is that I have a temp job that starts tomorrow morning. The bad news is that I have to be there at 8 am. The better news is that I don't have to sell anything.
Now, is it a coincidence that just 30 hours after Snarky decides to help me find a job, I finally have one? (Cue Twilight Zone music.) Needless to say, I'll be on a sharp lookout for chihuahuas on the job site.